I'm on board.

Tonight, I had the privilege of attending the opening night party for the New York Musical Theatre Festival (NYMF.) I have been getting increasingly more excited about our October 7th opening as the show I'm in has been taking shape, and tonight, the energy fueled my flame even more. NYMF is in it's seventh year and has 30 new shows. Everyone is working their tails off with the exhilarating challenge of creating what may be the next big hit in the musical theatre world!

Watching and feeling the energy in the room was both inspirational and encouraging. A well known Broadway actress sang a comedic song about the trials and tribulations on her "road to success." One line in it really rang true to me. When speaking of auditioning she said, "When they say 'no' don't get upset, it means 'yes' but just not yet." That summed up the hopes and feelings I've had as I am currently been pushing and striving to make this new career work.

Tonight was a reminder that I am not alone in this. No, I'm not financially "successful" in my new career yet, but I have broken into an amazing community of artists, and thereby, I'm going to claim that as "success" and just go from there.

It's about that time.

Alas, all good things must come to an end. Fortunately, that doesn't mean I have to leave NYC! It only means that I need to begin gearing myself up towards finding a "Real Job." I've been happily surviving on the "Government Artist Fund" i.e. Unemployment for a while, and I could extend come November, but my weekly benefit amount will be less than I can afford to live on. Bummer. But hey, things could always be worse! I woke up feeling a little anxsty about it even though it's still September, but the months fly by up here. I didn't want to be caught unprepared. So, I began putting out the feelers with friends first on Facebook. I'm hoping to get a job serving in a restaurant. I know for a fact that with the right gig I could make a killing and even get to the point where I am only working a few nights a week, but I have to find that gig! I'm also hoping to get some clowning gigs.

One thing that will be nice when I get "the right gig," is that I will hopefully find myself making more than I do on unemployment, and I'll actually be freed up to do more than simply survive. You know, the extravagantly luxurious things such as work on paying off my credit card, get health insurance-elitist things such as those!

Everything has its trade-off. On unemployment, my schedule was free and I could really get the rest I needed for classes and auditions. With a job, I'll definitely have to budget my time better so that I'm rested, but as I said before, I may be able to afford more. I enjoy working, fortunately, and I'm about at that point where I'm ready to do a little more in the city than simply enjoy it. I trust that somehow (perhaps with some digging,) the right job will present itself at the right time. After all, it simply has to.

By the way, I haven't given up hope that there is always a chance that I may book something before I have to get a job or run out of my dear Government Artist Funds. Let's not forget what I'm up here for.

A little early perhaps?

Some may find this strange, but then, so do I. I happened upon a friend's Facebook photo album that was entitled "Christmas in Kansas City." Lately, I have been missing what I finally accepted as my "home." My company continues without me. My friends go on without me, and yes, while I do the same without them, it's still strange for me.

When I thought about my favorite season, Christmas, it struck me to think of all the things I would miss. There are two radio stations that play Christmas music. I would listen to them in the car-I don't have one anymore (thank goodness) but still, it's weird. I'm preparing to dance in another Nutcracker, but it won't be the one I've "grown up with."

When will this transition plateau?!? The moment I think it's finished, something else rears its head. I'm fine with it, but still, it haunts me. Thankfully, the simplicity of the voice of a friend on the other end of the phone line can snap me into the reality that I am not really so far removed from those I love.

I am still a lucky boy.

The Nutcracker.

So, what everyone says is true. It's a lot harder to leave ballet behind than one might think! Yes, I still say I've "retired," but remember, I always was careful to say that I was retiring from "ballet company life."

The point of what I'm doing beating around the bush is to say that it seems I have booked a Nutcracker in Seattle in December! I will be playing the Sugar Plum Fairy's Cavalier which is a role I played during my career. I am excited for the challenge and the opportunity.

I feel fortunate to still have my health and ability to be able to dance gigs like this. What a gift. If I was so narrow minded as to say "No! I only do theatre now," I would starve. So, why not take a great paying gig while I still have the ability to do so! I need to remember that I trained my whole life to be able to do the things I do, and if they can provide me income and a level of comfort, then who am I to turn such an opportunity down! I'll get to travel to a wonderful city I've never been to and dance a wonderful role!

(and I didn't even have to audition.)