As I move into the "Nutcracker season," I have found myself feeling a bit down the last couple of days. I've wanted to do little more than watch movies and sleep. I am not a person who is usually lazy, but right now I'm having somewhat of a hard time motivating myself to do anything.
I think I pinpointed the issue today. Over the last month or so, I had so much momentum. I was working on the website, getting my business cards printed, making contacts for my visit to New York, doing my Fall show, etc. Now, I think I'm simply worn out. This makes me nervous because I know that I have so much more to do, but more than that I am getting more and more uneasy about this change. It is important for me to allow myself to acknowledge nerves such as this as they arise.
When making a life alteration such as this one, I imagine it is only natural to go through peaks and valleys emotionally and in the motivation department. I know I need to try not to worry about it too much and let it run its course. I know I'm not lazy. I know that I have what it takes to get myself through this. Most of all, I know that I need to breathe and try to relax into all of it. As I've said, this change coming-ready or not. I know I'll be ready, but as someone who is a control freak, it's difficult for me when I feel I'm at a pause. Time to find that second wind.
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
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